What Mentorship Is
Someone who meets with you regularly. Usually once a week or twice a month.
They are not a caseworker. They do not control your housing or benefits.
They are not your parole officer. They do not report violations.
Most mentors are volunteers. Some got paid by nonprofits. Some did time themselves years ago.
They talk to you. They give advice. They check in. That is it.
What Mentors Do NOT Fix
A mentor cannot get you a job. They can review your resume. They cannot hire you.
A mentor cannot get you housing. They can drive you to look at places. They cannot sign a lease for you.
A mentor cannot pay your bills. They might buy you lunch. That is different.
A mentor cannot speed up the system. They cannot move you up a waitlist. They cannot make Medicaid process faster.
A mentor cannot fix your record. They cannot call the court. They cannot file paperwork for you.
When Mentorship Helps
You need to practice interviews. A mentor can run mock interviews with you.
You need someone to show you how offices work. A mentor can walk you through the steps.
You need accountability for small goals. A mentor can check if you called that number. If you went to that appointment.
You are about to make a bad choice. A mentor can tell you what happened when they made it.
When Mentorship Is a Waste of Time
You need an ID and you do not have one. A mentor cannot fix this. Go to the resource center first.
You need a job and you have no applications out. Stop meeting. Start applying.
You need housing and you are not on any waitlists. Talking will not get you a bed.
You are using meetings to avoid doing things you know you need to do.
Common Mentor Traps
You start treating the mentor like a friend. You call them for everything. They stop answering.
You wait for the mentor to tell you what to do. Weeks pass. Nothing happens.
You talk about the same problem every meeting. You never take action between meetings.
You expect the mentor to feel bad for you. They do at first. Then they stop calling.
How to Use a Mentor Without Depending on Them
Meet once a week. No more. You need time to act on advice.
Bring a list of what you did since last time. Show proof. Job applications. Appointment receipts. Call logs.
Ask one specific question per meeting. Not ten. One.
Do not call between meetings unless it is urgent. Urgent means you are about to lose housing or miss a deadline.
If the mentor gives you a contact, use it that day. Do not wait.
If the mentor cannot help with something, say thank you and move on. Do not keep asking.
If You Choose Mentorship First
You will spend a month building a relationship with someone. That month you could have applied for fifty jobs.
You will wait for the mentor to connect you to people. Those people will ask what you have done on your own. You will have no answer.
You will talk about plans. You will not execute plans. The mentor will notice. They will stop meeting with you.
Your parole officer will ask what you have been doing. You will say you have a mentor. They will ask what jobs you applied for. You will have nothing to show.
Mentorship works when you are already moving. It does not replace movement.